thanks Dylan

you're very helpful and I really appreciate it! I'm going to order Roberts book at least, found it at bol.com where I always order my stuff, was kinda suprised to see it there

most of the time I can't find a lot of foreign books on something that isn't mainstream. But i think the site has expanded a lot in the last few years so i guess im not that suprised

.. gonna see if i have enough money to also buy one of Brendan Braziers books, was thinking of getting ''thrive'' because it seems to be a nice easy book for beginners and such

also saw the video, looks fun! and I read the 12 days stuff but it was kinda confusing to me, so I'll try and read it later when im more relaxed
right now I'm pretty stressed.. having a bad day again I guess.. been having a lot of bad days lately.. also because I get angry and sad really fast.. especially when it comes to my physique or things involving animal cruelty or meat stuff.. like.. i got pretty angry the other day because at my parents place, they have a regular store, much like any other store, only there was no vegan mock-meat anymore, they sometimes have this 1 kind of mock-meat, think its just from soy, and it's really tasty, but this time they didn't have it.. so i got angry cus they always have 20 different kinds of dirty meat in plenty but never a vegan replacer for meat.. we use that soy stuff (we just call them vega-bits

) in a couple of our dishes to make it a bit nicer then just a big pile of veggies xD ..
anyhow thanks again

.. ill order the books today, or at least Robert's book and then it should be delivered to me within 5 or 7 days according to the website ^_^
I also read some of the people's bio like this one;
http://www.veganbodybuilding.com/?page=bio_richard for example

theyre all very inspiring to me ^^ and hopefully at some point I can be a inspiration to people too!
now imma go for a little walk.. got a tummyache from stress.. i think..
so far, my day today looks like this;
got out of bed around 8:00 this morning, we (me and my boyfriend) made some oatmeal, I only ate half of my oatmeal.. I never manage to eat a lot in the morning.. and I got pretty stressed over it today too, which added up to the stress I already had =( .. after that I worked out a little, just some stretching, a quick five push-ups, fooled around with some tiny weights while punching air and stretched a bit more, then I had two sandwiches with banana and rasped coconut and a mug of green tea which I just finished. It's 10:50 now and im going for a walk, hopefully I will feel better after
EDIT;It's 12:10 now and after the walk i feel a lot better. we did the dishes and im eating 4 sandwiches with 'tartex' and lettuce now. it's super tasty and oh so simple.. I have corn bread btw, its awesome in taste <3
I feel a bit more positive now and me and my boyfriend talked a bit about the physical progress that im making etc. we also found out my right arm (bicep) has grown 0.5 centimeters around (width? dunno the word) (didnt flex, just .. kept my arm loose) in 4 weeks or such, so thats pretty good

my biceps also look a bit better when i flex them anyway, maybe thats just because i actually work out enough now, i never really did that before ofcourse

anyhow just felt like sharing o.o feel kinda awkward now xD oh well!
oh and I have like these uuh.. veggie snacks? theyre like.. baked cookie-ish things.. it's seen a lot with chinese food.. only these are healthy and without those little sea bugs/animals (really forgot the name.. tiny.. creatures?).. I have no idea what this is, should look at the package more next time, but they're very healthy apparantly and just a nice healthy snack, my boyfriend assured me anyway.
oh! aand.. more updates.. last night we had red rice for dinner.. it wasnt very special, just tasted like brown rice to me, maybe my boyfriends mom didn't cook it right

.. anyhow think thats all for today!