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June 27th - suicide mission

 

 

I arrived to Baltimore yesterday morning. Early.

I did not get any sleep that night due to highly uncomfortable airplanes and a seat that wouldn't cooperate with me at all. It was stuck! I had to sit like a dang liner all night.

I miss Portland and everyone I've gotten to know. It's so weird not having Robert around. I miss that a whole lot. No one to mess with, no one there for morning hugs, no one that understands my jokes!

 

I slept between 9am and 7pm, only got up for an occational glass of water. Went to church, got home at 10:45pm, stuffed myself with pasta, PB and salad, went back to sleep and got up at 10:30am today. If I hadn't glanced at my watch, I would have fallen back asleep.

 

I cannot believe I ate pasta and PB! Both is ing (especially the PB since it was non organic filled with high fructose corn syrup and other nasty things...)

 

So in one day, I've slept 20 hours! I had a few pieces of fruit (and the nastiness listed above) to eat. The humidity and the heat is killing my apetite. It's so bad I seriously consider during a water fast for a while. I've found a blender so at least I'll make hearthy smoothies (if I can be bothered, it's so dang...breathtaking just to lift my pale bottoms off hte couch and walk out to the kitchen). Hopefully I'll find that juicer too. I better, I just stuffed the fridge with lovely chlorophyl rich kale! That, is anything, should cleanse me out pretty well.

 

So when I woke up at 10:30, I had a quart of wather (by the way, I was so dehydrated yesterday that even though I had like a gallon of water, I didn't pee once! How weird isn't that?).. I let it sink for an hour, and then I decided to go for a run.

 

Just by stepping outside I realised it was a suicide mission. It was at least 100 degrees, add to that burning hot sunshine and heaps of humidity..

My body told me to go back inside, go to bed and don't even think about moving one inch!

I didn't listen.

I never do. What can I say? It's the finnish blood in me (50% swedish, 50% finnish), the stubborness. If I have set my mind on something, I dang sure make it happen!

I thought an 8 mile run would cure me!

After the first mile I considered stopping the first person coming my way, begging him or her to get a gun and end my suffering right there, right then.

But I ain't no quitter!

After 2 miles, I thought I might survive 2 more, and then walk the other 4.

That did not happen.

After 3 miles, I seriously had some pretty major death wishes.

After 4 miles, I was as good as dead.

My body was so overheated that when I stopped, my legs wouldn't carry me and I started shivering like a nut. Freezing, with major withdrawals and goodsebumps all over my body, in 100 degree humid heat I was freezing.

I crawled back home with a posture of a cheez doodle (vegan, people. Vegan!). That would usually take 5-7 minutes. This time it took me at least 15. I had no controll over my legs, or arms for that matter. That was the weirdest feeling ever!!! And I don't want to experience that ever again!

I think the run itself took about 35 minutes. Horrible!!! I couldn't breathe properly because the air felt so thick. For me, 4 miles in 35 minutes is failure!! Pure failure!!

But I guess I have to pat myself on the back after all. I did survive! And I didn't stop to puke once. Not that I would have had anything but bile to puke anyway.

Good thing: No one passed me.

Another good thing: I passed everyone in front of me! Even a couple other suicidal runners.

But 4 miles in 35 minutes or so (it might have been..32)??? Man, that is not good.

 

I will make sure to drink heaps of water throughout the day, go to bed early adn then tomorrow, get up fairly early when it's still somewhat "cold", like 85 or so,a nd then WALK them 4 miles! At least walking is better than doing nothing.

 

Or beg for someone to take me to a local gym!

 

I will never complain about Portland being too cold, ever again!

(Robert, you might quote me on that).

 

I'm off to the couch now! Time for a nap! What else is there to do anyways but sleep?

 

Have a lovely day everyone.

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That's my kind of weather You'll get used to it...or maybe its better to save the training for the nighttime. You'll be more acclimated due to being out in the day.

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Hey Liz,

 

Portland misses you too. I talked about you quite a bit today when I was working with Bo and John from Blossoming Lotus. We look forward to you helping get me back into shape so I represent this community more effectively.

 

Of course, not only Portland misses you but I do too. Shake and Bake baby!

 

When I was my heaviest, I used to eat pasta with peanut butter on it nearly every day or multiple times a day! I just ate and ate and ate foods packed full of calories.

 

It was heaps food and heaps fun. How cool isn't that?

 

The funny (or not funny) thing is that after you left it was 90 degrees here, but it doesn't feel as hot as 90 degrees over there so it has been great weather! Perfect weather for Vanilla Ice to perform in soon.

 

It sounds like you are getting plenty of rest. I know there wasn't much time for rest while you were here. I have a tendency to create busy itineraries for friends when they're here. So all the traveling and functions and activities probably wore you down a bit and now you can recover. I'm trying to do the same but was up at 6AM today to help Bo, but it was great! Maybe I'll video blog about it later.

 

Make the most of the few weeks you have over on the East Coast and Portland looks forward to your return

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June 28th - no longer on death row

 

 

Where to start?

I woke up at 10am today. Actually, I first woke up at 8am with a bursting bladder begging for mercy, but buefore I had a chance to talk myself into going all the way to the bathroom, I must have fallen back asleep, because I woke up again at 10.

 

Started the day with a quart of water, found some dumbbells and a pilates pall and a skipping rope, so I got down to business! I goofed around for a good 30 minutes workin gup quite of a sweat, then I went for a walk. Same route as yesterday but today I was wise enough not to run! The walk did me good, the trail has a lot of hills so after 70 minutes I felt I was fairly exhausted - or at least exhausted enough to go back to the house for some breakfast. Which I'm having now (after another quart of water).

It's icecubes, a pint of fresh blueberries and one and a half scoop of vega. I dunno if it's the blueberries, but the consistence of that shake is like...yello. Slimy and...delliscious!! But it wont cooperate with my mouth and I couldn't find a straw, so I'm having a bit of a struggle atm.

 

I feel a lot better today! My energy is returning to me and my bloatedness from all the junk is almost gone, leaving me with just a few lbs of fatty weight gain, but that will come off in two seconds! As soon as I get back to my muay thai training hah!

 

I have been reading a lot of raw books lately, and I was about 80% raw when I visited portland (well...after I told myself I have to try everything..at least once (the coconut icecream more than once though)). All that cooked...junk, made me really bloated, heavy and tired. I constantly went into a food coma and I no longer had any desire to train. It was a horrible feeling. And all I wanted was to regain some of my character and go back to mostly raw.. so I've read a lot of books with a goal to reach 100% raw like...yesterday..

But that is not very smart either and I ahve to admit I have beena little stressed about not making it as easily as I imagined..

I know my body the best. If my body is craving something, I know it's doing it for a reason! (food people, not chocolate or doughnuts or any junk like that) These past 3 days I've been back to 80% raw, and for me, that is great! It works well, I have so much energy (today at least, now that my body is starting to get rid of the junk trapped inside of me) and not to mention how yummy it is mith fresh fruits and vegs. I no longer have any desire of going 100% raw atm. I'm happy with what I have achieved so far.

 

I do admire people who are 100% raw. I know that it takes a lot to get there and it probably is optimal health. But in the end.. food should not be something that stresses us out. It takes most people years to even achieve being 50% raw, even longer going 80% raw... I've only been vegan for like, 8 or 9 months or so, and only these past I dunno, 2-3 months been eating mostly raw. I have a long way to go, but I am happy with that. Because the most important thing is health. Being happy, enjoying training, enjoying food, not letting what we eat controll our social life or anything else for that matter. Just relax, lean back, listen to your body and enjoy the ride.

 

I've found my first road kill!! A snake. To me, that is pretty..eh, I don't want to say kool, but at least, um, special! yeah, or no! ahh. Anyway, in sweden we mostly have bunnies as road kills, and cats. So to just find a huge green snake all flat on the ground, was a weird experience. WE have like 2 kinds of snakes in sweden, and one of them is not even a snake buta lizard with no legs.

On the trail I also run into a TURTLE!!! now, how cool isn't THAT???? I have never before seen a live turtle just like that, out in the nature. It was brown with like, yellow orange kindish spots. I kneeled to say hi and cuddle a bit, but I think I scared him to death or so cus he put his head into his shell..

Well mr Turtle, I don't find you all that attractive either!!

 

Humm...and dad brought me good news! I've finally got my own flat! It's about as big as a closet, but it's all mine, and I'll move in september first. This is awesome news because I've been trying to find a flat for almost a year!! So anyone can visit me now!! Assum!

 

Have a lovely day all!

 

Liz(t)ard

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Well Liz - I am glad to hear you are out of the food coma

 

I know that eating 80% raw can have a huge healthy impact on your daily life. I say the same thing - do what works best and try everything once - well some things

 

Now tell me this - are you no longer going to be living in Sweden? as you say you are in Baltimore and you found a flat to move into?

 

Cause I was hoping I could make it to Sweden some day and now you are wrecking my plans

 

Cheers,

 

Steve

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Hi Mr Bananas

 

Naw, I haven't found a flat in Baltimore, I've found one in my home town in Malmö, Sweden! So I haven't wrecked yer plans and you are more than welcome for a visit! If you don't mind sharing a flat as big as a closet hahah!

However, I liked Portland so much that I am thinking about returning in the near future for some kind of studying - like art school.

But I leave that undecided. If it is God's will that I, once again, leave Sweden, than so be it!

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Hey Liz, I'm happy to hear about gaining your energy level back up

Reaching before that point is probably the hardest of the most. You did it..

That's so awesome. Also I liked what you wrote in paragraph 7 (no longer death row)

Congrats on your new place (flat)

Come back soon

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June 29th - a tired piece os ass!

 

 

Yeah.. I had a somewhat turbulent evening yesterday, so I slept in, again. Got up at 11am - had a quart of water as usual, went for a ride to drop off the girls at their jobs, went to pick up the other car, drove home, went for a walk, that turned into a jog, that turned into a brisk jog. I didn't die.. and I kept a good breathing technique today (breathing a LOT more, even though it kind of hurt my lungs at first), I think that helped a lot, I managed to get enough oxygen not to die, and it was cooler today - 70 degrees, buit still humid and hard to breathe. It's been raining all night and morning, apparently. So nice not to have to deal with that awful heat. But I don't mind the heat, it's the humidity that really bothers me.

After my jog, sure I was sweaty, anything else would have been unthinkable, but I wore a tank top and a short sleeve, and ven though my whole body was sticky and icky and gross, I wasn't all soaked. The sticky, icky, grossness ofcourse was due to the ing humidity.

 

I am a bit embarrassed to admit, I just had breakfast.. heaps of fresh, yellow squash and peaches. Weird combo, wut it worked quite well I must say. I saw my family making a dish out of yellow squashes and I just HAD to have some... lucky me they had like 5 big ones.

I say it once again - the heat and humidity just scare my apetite away. Because I sure know how to eat! But why suffer if apetite is missing? Better to drink a lot of water or fresh juice instead and let the body tell you when it's ready to handle food.

That's my opinion at least.

 

Ed - I think pasta is gross! mostly because it's nothing more than gluten rich flour and water. When I have pasta, which is on occation only, I usually pick noodles instead that is made of something that is gluten free. I'd say I'm more of a potato gal.

 

Thanks for stopping by, Tash

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flip!!!!

My stupid laptop just deleated everything I wrote!

That sucks, and Im too lazy to re write everything so I wont.

Man, such a thing can annoy me for the rest of the day...or at least for 5 minutes, Too bad, for I had written some funny things, My oppinion hahaha!

 

I woke up, killed my abs, killed my legs, went for a walk, got TO'd when i saw a guy hit his dog and another girl smack hers with the leash and then laugh about it when she saw that the dog got scared, and smack him again. Man, I was so pissed about that!!!!!

 

Found the juicer, use it for breakfast, realised that kale still botheres me since I had food poisoning, now I have to fight my taste buds again!

 

Survival of the strongest!!!

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Sorry things got deleted

 

That happens to me sometimes so as you saw in Portland, I copy everything before I post it.

 

Sucks about the dogs getting smacked

 

Sorry I forgot to send you the carrot juice recipe you wanted....I'll try to get on that soon.

 

I also killed abs yesterday and legs the day before. Today is probably arms. I've been eating some good building foods too. Thanks for the help with that.

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Dude, I wasn't even done typing when it all disappeared! I must have touched something by accident, uaually I just go back one step and it's all there still, but it didn't work this time. Bummer!

 

Im coloring one of the girl's hair. We're doing a root job and some highlights!

Coloring is heaps fun!!

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flip!!!!

My stupid laptop just deleated everything I wrote!

That sucks, and Im too lazy to re write everything so I wont.

Man, such a thing can annoy me for the rest of the day...or at least for 5 minutes, Too bad, for I had written some funny things, My oppinion hahaha!

 

I woke up, killed my abs, killed my legs, went for a walk, got TO'd when i saw a guy hit his dog and another girl smack hers with the leash and then laugh about it when she saw that the dog got scared, and smack him again. Man, I was so pissed about that!!!!!

 

Found the juicer, use it for breakfast, realised that kale still botheres me since I had food poisoning, now I have to fight my taste buds again!

 

Survival of the strongest!!!

 

You should of round kicked her in the ears. Wouldn't we wished !

Sucks about your laptop having it's mind of his own

That just about happend to me when I was writing that long message to you... I would of been so angry hahaha

I'm glad to see you got a juicer ! Yaaah !

Have a good night Liz!

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YEah Tash...I should kick everyone that hurt their pets in the ears. That would certainly be something. I have gotten in trouble before for butting in, so I tend not to do it anyymore. Call it wisdom or lack of guts... I dunno.

 

So I was all raw juicing today..

Untill I had a very emotional....evening, so now we're out of PB hahah!

 

Oh well...shait happens!

But I just promised Zack to go all raw during VV just to support him, becaus ehe'll be all raw, and Im pretty sure there will be goodies around. Oh my oh my... I think I need to get my arse back to sweden and rebuild my proper eating habits hahah!

 

Time for bed... It's already past midnight! What on earth am I doing up this late???

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YEah Tash...I should kick everyone that hurt their pets in the ears. That would certainly be something. I have gotten in trouble before for butting in, so I tend not to do it anyymore. Call it wisdom or lack of guts... I dunno.

 

So I was all raw juicing today..

Untill I had a very emotional....evening, so now we're out of PB hahah!

 

Oh well...shait happens!

But I just promised Zack to go all raw during VV just to support him, becaus ehe'll be all raw, and Im pretty sure there will be goodies around. Oh my oh my... I think I need to get my arse back to sweden and rebuild my proper eating habits hahah!

 

Time for bed... It's already past midnight! What on earth am I doing up this late???

Yeah, ok, I'll watch you eat kale while I eat pizza, donuts and ice cream. I think that's the torture method of choice in Iraq

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July 1st - the first day of the rest of my life

 

Offense - you are so cruel!!! I'll get you for that

 

Tasha - you rock babe!! You are my biggest support! Girl power for sure and bring some kicks with that hahah!

 

 

Today the sun is shining, it's nice out, almost like sweden. Not too hot and not humid at all!

My run went well, I will have breakfast soon.

I just don't know what I feel like eating, but it's leaning towards everything that is in the kitcken! I'm HUNGRY!!!!

 

I saw another turtle today. Strange, I had no idea I was livin gin Turtle Towh hah! Becaus eI haven't seen Ed around at all...

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July 2nd - the day I ran my pants off!

 

I had a horrible morning! I have some things back home I ahve to deal with, that involves money. I can't do it from here, and just thinking about the whole thing makes me really stressed out and ready to weep like a baby!

I did have a good talk with my "mom" here and she has a lot of wisdom. I should not worry about it, should not let that ruin my staying here! Whenever all the bad thoughts come, I have to block them away and just leave everything to God. Worse case scenario, I don't get my money! But it's not like my life is depending on it (well it sort of is..)

 

So I went out on the trail.

I always work out when I have rough times. I train untill I can train no more!

That didn't happen this time though, but 2 hours and 15 minutes out on that trail is fairly allright I'd say! And for 30 minutes before that I was skipping rope and doing some exercises on my exetube! So a good 2 hour 45 minute constant workout at least it did cheer me up big time and I feel a heck of a lot better now!

There's nothing in the world like endorphines!

 

So I don't think I'll do much more than read, tan, eat and sleep today! Maybe I will go for a walk later on just for the relaxation. I did see a deer today. A huge one, just jumped out from the woods, stood there right in front of me, like he wasn't even aware tha tI was there...adn then took off again! What a powerful meeting! I was in awe! Of course I see them all the time at home, but never like this, and never this close!

 

man I gotta pee big time! Someone's in the bathrom and wont come out! DANG!!

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