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  • 3 weeks later...

BLAAAH!!

 

I'm so depressed. I've had this nasty cold for over a week now. It started off just feeling kinda run down and tired all the time. I didn't want to do much but I still worked out at home. My diet has been crummy for the past few months to be honest. I'm not eating lots of junk food or anything, just not many calories and not enough fresh stuff. Last Monday I woke up with the cold from hell! And of course, being sick I can't work out. Double bummer. I can tell I've lost a little weight by looking in the mirror. My sleep schedule is totally out of whack cuz I sleep when I can.. Which is basically when my sinuses decide to give me a break.

 

Anyways, to kick this cold I've been relying solely on echinacea. I'm still very stuffed up and not sure when it will be good for me to go to the gym again. I don't think I'm contagious anymore but I don't wanna go to the gym and wake up the next day with a relapse!

Sometimes I miss working out so much that I think "Oh maybe I'll just get down on the floor and do a few pushups.." Haha!

 

Anyhow, that's my update.

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Yup. So not working out for the past two weeks has taken a real toll on my state of mind. I'm bored. I'm restless. I've got ants in my pants!!

 

The other day I wanted to see if I could still lift Silvio. I can! But not without gimping my hip

So for a few days I hobbled around feeling like a dorkstick for injuring myself and goofing around! Feels much better today though.

 

Every time I look in the mirror I see a skinny little skeleton. I keep asking Silvio "Am I skinnier? Did I lose weight?" and he laughs and says I'm silly cuz I still look the same to him. I swear I shrunk though. I feel so puny and weak!

 

I've been having stomach issues for the past week or so. I don't know if it's side effects from the meds the doc gave me (which I stopped taking) or if it's from my cold.. Or IBS. I've been eating a diet consisting of bananas, toast and oatmeal. Really boring. And for some reason I really like pickles. It's like I'm pregnant but not.

 

Anyways my goal is to hit the gym on Saturday and start eating again. I worry my little tummy shrunk even more and it's going to be hard to gain back the weight I think I lost.. Lol!

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I worked out tonight and I feel SOOOOO good! Just did upper body. Did it at home.

I had the WORST migraine today. I was on birth control pills for awhile.. For years. Anyways, they started giving me acne and stuff so the doctor gave me a new kind, but the new kind make me sick to my stomach and very very depressed. So I stopped taking them. I've decided not to take anymore birth control pills ever again. I can't deal with the hormone fuckage and the guilt of taking a non-vegan, unfriendly-to-the-environment medication.

Anyways, my hormones going back to normal is what caused my migraine I think. It lasted like 18 hours. NASTAY! I was incapacitated for most of the day.

 

Now I gotta figure out what to use for birth control. I wonder if I can get an IUD? My doctor said they won't do them on women my age but I don't wanna screw around with my hormones anymore. It can't be healthy. I apologize to the men reading this about me bitching about my girly problems

 

In other news, I saw "The Dark Knight" last night. Kick ass movie. I love movies with lots of action and fighting and stuff. So weird. For my birthday I got a Rambo box set. Now I want the Rocky one but it's 50 bucks!! Ouch.

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  • 1 month later...

So now that I'm off the birth control pills I've noticed some strength gains. Also my acne is GONE! My skin hasn't been this clear since I was 11 years old. It's SAWEEEET!

My weight is still the same after my "bulking" session this winter. I just couldn't manage to increase my strength. Training was tough during those times. I couldn't always make it to the gym because of the big dumping of snow we got!

Anyways, I think I look more muscular than I did a few months ago. I'm starting to show some vascularity. I'm squatting 160 pounds which is the most I've ever been able to do. I currently weigh 114. I'm benching 75 pounds now, whereas before I was benching 30.

 

Things are looking up! Despite the troll that's been hanging around insulting me and the other ladies on here.. I say troll because she tells everyone how ripped she is but has no pics to back it up. Can she be banned or something? Srsly. We don't need any egos around here. It's good to be proud of your efforts like Robert, Jimi, and Giacamo, but they aren't arrogant. I may not be some bulging, ripped, She-Hulk, but I work hard to get in shape. I've come a long way the past few years.

 

Here are some photos. I'll have to say that my area with the most improvement is my shoulders ^^

 

Bicep

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/Marcina_leigh/SDC10585.jpg

 

Shouldah's!!!

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/Marcina_leigh/SDC10588.jpg

 

Legs. Still hate them

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/Marcina_leigh/SDC10592.jpg

 

Loook how clear my skin is!!

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/Marcina_leigh/SDC10596.jpg

 

Abs. Hopefully get more defined as I cut some bodyfat

http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y267/Marcina_leigh/SDC10602.jpg

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Thanks you guys ^^

 

Yeah, my skin just recently cleared up like that. Guess my hormones are back to normal. Woohoo! I hope I don't jinx it by celebrating and end up with a big fat one tomorrow haha!

 

Been drinking tons of water too.

 

Life is good.

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I am so friggin OBSESSED with that rude woman who just joined recently. No introduction, just starts jumping into forums and badmouthing people.. And I retaliated. I apologize to the people who had to read that. It's just not like me to sit back and let other people bully me. I was bullied a lot at a young age by people who just have no couth.. Just like that. I used to sit back and ignore it hoping it would go away but it got WORSE. For the sake of my own sanity I just had to stand up and stick up for myself.

 

I work hard, I don't need to take that shit! Like that song "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister. Well I'm not gonna take it! People like that make me SICK! You know it's good to be confident and believe in yourself, but not if you have to belittle others to feel that way. It's just not right.

 

Anyways, I'm going to post the conversation we had in private for everyone to see because there are 2 sides to every story. I feel that if I post it up, if anyone wants to see it, they can see for themselves what really happened. I had to think about this a bit because I clearly made an ass out of myself purely out of anger. So here it is:

 

It started with me sending her this message:

 

I'm gonna tell you why I was offended by your comments.

 

First of all, you said I only won the competitions because I have a pretty face. You also said that it looks like I don't even work out. Then you proceeded to tell me my biceps look like "knots". Then you insult me because I was wearing pajamas in one of my photos with cats on them (not fluffy bunnies, sorry).

 

I'm gonna be brutally honest with you. I think you're a bitch. You come in here, telling everyone how much better your figure is than everybody's and you haven't even posted pics to prove it. I'm PMing you because I don't want to hijack the thread explaining how much of an elitist shitstorm you're causing.

 

If you want to show everyone how much better you look, then fuckin' show us. Post up some pictures. Put your money where your mouth is.

 

And lastly...

 

If you don't like how the judging in an online competition is (which is purely for fun ONLY) then just leave. Nobody will miss you, I promise.

 

Then I got this:

 

Yah..well if you cant admit the real reson you won continue with your disillusion

OH..and by the way, I didn't see the fotos of your pygamas it was purely coincidence I made this comment..but it kinda proves my point no?

 

And I replied with this:

 

It's just for fun anyways, not a real contest.

 

What the fuck is your problem? Are you pissed off because you didn't start bulking up at a young age? You going through some kind of midlife crisis? Or are you really just some sadsack fat chick who's jealous of all the 20 somethings on the forum who have actually gotten recognition for their efforts?

 

Once again.. If you wanna tell people how awesome your superhero physique is, prove it.

 

Pics or it didn't happen.

 

Let me explain something to you:

 

I've been weight training for a few years. Everybody knows it takes time to build muscle density. Also, I don't take supplements. No creatine, L-glutamine, steroids, or even protein isolates. I'm not a bodybuilder. I never claimed to be. Also, I've been a vegetarian since I was 15, vegan since 21. I battled an eating disorder from 2002 to 2008. Several reasons why I'm not a hulking woman bodybuilder.

 

If you think I shouldn't have won an online figure contest that was for T-shirts than that's your choice. I really don't give a shit what you think. You want me send my T-shirt to you?

 

And I got this back:

 

Fuck you you stupid little bitch!

Don't write to me again

When they open up the competitions I'll upload my pictures don't worry.

Fuckin Barbie!

 

 

And that's the whole story.

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Sheesh....

 

I certainly think you look like you go to the gym...you have gorgeous arms and shoulders!

 

I really don't get this women. If she doesn't like the way things are done here then she should just go and find a different forum to hang out in.

 

Anyway, you obviously work very hard and I think you have a lot to be proud of.

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Sorry to hear about that Marcina

 

I can relate of being bullied and harrassed when I was growing up. Even family would tease me about my weight. They would say things like I would probably get a boyfriend if I lost weight. Then on top of that I would get bullied and threaten at school, that I was going to get my ass kicked for looking at someone the wrong way. Anyways enough about my passed, it's my passed forgiving and forgotten.

 

I know living in the present, I feel fantastic, I'm fit and in the best shape I've ever been in. I look at all the people who use to tease me and they are all drinkers, smokers, fat and out of shape and put on 5 yrs on their faces.

Now they are looking up to me, asking me how I look so good. And that they wished they could get in shape and eat better.

 

So, if you turn something negative into positive life works out so much easier.

 

Even though it doesn't feel real on the internet but it still hurts when you read things that bother you. But what I do if I haven't met anyone on here in person, is I try not to take things at heart. It's most likely someone wants to get an reaction out of their comments. And she got what she wanted. Just ignore it, she'll get more pissed if no one says anything because she doesn't have anything to fight about if no one else is fighting back.

 

She's probably out of shape, with low self esteem and that maybe she wishes she could be like all of the buffed and well fit females on here. Or just with low self esteem with a nice fit body. ? I dunno, It might be her way to express her feelings.

I guess will have to wait and see if she posts any pics of her.

but she still a mean mean person.

 

Again I'm sorry you felt hurt. Just take it out on the weights, instead of exhausting yourself trying to reason with her.

 

You looking great as always. You're are rocking Marcina !!!!!

That why you win them all

Edited by Tasha
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Aww bless you guys! Such kind words. I really appreciate it.

 

I do admit, I feel more motivated to kick ass in the gym now.

The other day I used my anger to fuel my workout. WOW. I'm still sore from it! It was intense.

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You have such a beautiful body Marcie, don't take her words to your heart.

 

Some people just don't have the social skills to be able to understand how everyone else feels and usually they're the ones talking most brutally and bluntly. They just are just completely lacking of empathy - to understand how everyone else feels and so their social skills are very monotonous as they treat others the way they themselves think they should be treated.

 

You did a right thing to stand up for yourself and I'm SO proud of you sweet heart.

 

Rock on my rocking beauty! <3

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I started an awesome exercise routine yesterday. Something I picked up in Oxygen where you do a push/pull routine alternating heavy and light weights. It really hit the muscles and felt great. I was actually fatigued after my workout!

 

But alas, I have managed to catch some sort of cold virus. Last Saturday I went to a club to see some bands, plus the hockey game was on so the place was packed. I wish people would LEAVE THEIR GERMS AT HOME!!! Blarg. It sucks cuz I was sick in March for a week. I guess my immune system isn't back to full strength yet if I caught a cold that easily. Or maybe it was because last week I went running and got caught in the rain. I got home SOAKED! I went straight to the shower though.

Ehhhh.. I'm just gonna rest today and take my echinacea and eat lots of nanners. So far it's just a runny nose.

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oh no! Youre sick too! that sucks. i hope you feel better soon. oh and btw since i didnt mention it before-that woman was a bitch and you were right <3

 

Lol I love you guys.

 

Yeah, I'm having a big cup of tea right now. Also, I still have a good appetite so that's good. I should be over this cold in no time!

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Wooo my cold is GONE! YEAH!!

 

I slept a ton the past couple days. I'm pretty tired now though because I only got 2 hours of sleep. I woke up hungry and had to have breakfast.. Lately I've been awake at the wee hours of the morning so my body is used to having an early meal.

 

Today I'm gonna hit the gym! Because of the stupid illnesses I've been getting.. Like the flu in March, then IBS issues in April (diarrhea boooooooooooo!) and now another cold, my goals are totally off track right now. It's really frustrating cuz I feel like I have to start all over again. I really hope I stop getting sick and can workout regularly from now on!

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Yep, I think that woman was a stright up jerk. You're the greatest, Marcina.

 

So, how did you get rid of that cold? Just sleep? I've been fighting something nasty for the past couple of days, and I can't seem to kick it.

 

Are you gonna post the details of your new workout?

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Sleeping, eating, taking echinacea.

 

dude last night I DID NOT sleep! I guess my body is used to sleeping all day. Now the nice weather is back and my body thinks it's wake up time! Gonna be tired tonight after the gym, that's for sure!

 

Yes, I should post my workouts because it really helps with my progress. I gotta remember to take my notebook to the gym!

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Thank youuuu!!

 

 

I took it easier last night cuz I don't wanna overdo it. I did chest, triceps, and shoulders. I did it at home. All I have is 15 pound weights so I did a variety of exercises to keep it challenging.

 

Tricep presses, dips, chest press, chest flies, tricep kickbacks, lateral raises and military presses. I did 15 reps on the easier exercises, and 6 on the harder ones. I did about 3 sets each alternating easy and hard workouts.

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Yesterday was an active rest day. I did lots and lots of walking. It was such a beautiful day, I didn't want to spend it indoors. Me and Silvio went shopping and bought some clothes at Value Village. Then we went to the mall and had lunch. I hit the salad and juice bar (but was very disappointed in the variety of fresh veggies and fruits. Also, my juice was warm, but at least it was freshly made). After lunch we window shopped a bit and went to the park.

I was so tired yesterday because I woke up at 6:30. I ended up going to bed at 8 because I was sooo tired! Lately I've been waking up a lot in the middle of the night because it's hot. It's cloudy today though. I'm a bit disappointed because I wanted a nice day like yesterday again!

 

Today I'm deciding what I should do.. Go for a jog.. Workout at home, or wait for Silvio to wake up and then go to the gym?

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Boo hoo I got the flu!! AGAIN!

 

Srsly, this is getting old. The shitty thing is that once you get sick, and you recover, your immune system is weakened for all sorts of other bugs to attack ya!

 

Last week was going great. I was eating really clean. Lots of yummy raw foods, going outside, doing sprints, lifting weights, getting lean and buff! Then my sister calls me. She and her daughter are sick, and wanted me to take them to the doctor and help take care of the little one. How can I say no? They are my family, I love them. So, I took my sister and niece to the doctor, spent the day helping out and stuff. The same day I got a job interview and it went rather well.

 

The next day was great too. I went to the gym and did legs. Then Friday, I got a call back from the place I applied for a job at. I didn't get it. Since it was the first job interview I'd had since October, even though I've been applying EVERYWHERE I was very upset. I got depressed and was very angry at myself for not getting the job. I guess with my being upset, and working out the day before, and being exposed to the flu virus was the perfect recipe for my body to get afflicted with it. Yesterday I couldn't eat anything except for 2 bananas. It was a stomach virus. Very nasty. Today I've been able to eat but still a bit queasy and have little appetite.

 

The good news is, I just made this AWESOME raw banana ice cream. I got the recipe from Bif Naked (who else?)

 

2 frozen bananas

2 tablespoons of raw tahini

Some Vega (optional)

Blend it (a hand blender works) and OM YUMMY IN MY TUMMY!!! Perfect food for a hot day paired with danger belly. It's a must try.

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