Bigorexia gives me pause...
Really wanted to make my arm muscles much larger but only made my arms smaller
--went from 11.5 to 10.00
All the while taking in more cals & working harder.
Dysmorphia = Cruel Mistress
Love the "Faux Food Fighter" thing. Awesome.
Try this on for size. I happen to believe, and I'm not alone in this, that the body responds more powerfully to thoughts than action. Which means that what you think about something is far more important than what anybody else says about it, or what you do about it. If you do what all the experts say because you think you are scrawny and need to get bigger, what carries more weight, the actions you are taking or the belief that you are scrawny? Clue: Many, many people hit the weights every day with an intensity that would impress Jay Cutler but they bring with them into the gym a muscle-shrinking mindset that says "I am not enough yet." Year after year, these people stay pretty small. They gotta get to the place of "This is working" before it will work. Seems like a mind scrambler, I know, but if you deeply desire physical change and passionately believe that you can accomplish more than what has been done before, are you wrong or are you an Olympic athlete? (Answer: you are an Olympic athlete. If Olympians only did what has been done before, no records would be broken, ever.)
To get in the mindset, review your facts: your are freakin' awesome. You are tight, strong, educated, experienced, you could teach anybody in the gym a thing or two about a leg workout. You have seen the dark side and you know what it feels like to break through it. You have felt the intoxicating euphoria of success, the sweetest mental morphine of them all. You've loved and you've built things. You are hot. You are funny. You've seen sunsets. You're gonna change everything they say.
Knowing all this, your biceps will grow. It's true. Hold onto it.