Vegan Bodybuilding & Fitness

If anyone reads my blog they know i've been struggling with day long binges/cheats/re-feeds, whatever you want to call it. I got really lean for a contest and so far even though i feel like crap the first few days after i binge, my weight gets back to normal and many times even less than the previous week (of course im on a calorie deficit and doing a lot of cardio and liftin) ive basically remained at my one week out weight for 6 weeks (by mid/end of week after cheating)...but still feel guilty and like i am doing harm. ive been trying to google this phenomenon and i've come across a lot of different answers, a lot of broscience etc....can i get some input from this community on this? and yes i know there are psychological issues involved and yes i know i probably have an eating disorder..i really want feedback on the physiological effects and my cheat days include a lot of vegan junk foods like diaya and desserts and chocolate and nuts...some fruits tho. and im easily putting away 4k calories once a week. 1700-1900 on regular days. thanks!

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Maybe because of feeling relieved from the stress of the competition, uncounsciously you tend to those foods, they're meant to be "comfort foods" and I guess you have some kind of stress before a competition (in body and mind), then just after, your body reacts craving something that would soothe it... I read something in this context in one of the Thrive books.... As an advice...maybe you should incorporate in your post-competition diet some of the foods so that you can have them without feeling guilty...? ...and little by little ditching them from your diet again....

But it can also be due to the restriction, after feeling deprived for some time, you really crave those foods... I know quite a bit about restriction and binges and I would say that the best option is to give in "a little" ...like having just one little cheat everyday... if possible... (tho difficult, I know!).

Maybe you could plan ahead your cheat day/meal or refeed day so that it doesn't get out of hand, tho still allowing you to have what you want/crave.

Oh well, that's really not much more than "broscience" I guess? but I hope that could help a little.