My pet peeves are ESSUEVEES, smacking, people taking up the whole span of an isle knowingly leaving me no room to pass by/through them, girls walking through the store texting and running into me, rattling car panels at a red light from stupid rap/hip hop that I don't want to hear, cashiers not at their register when I come up to it, or if they are someone else is there and they're telling others' business in front of me, not paying attention to me or their job at all, talking about when who is going to get off of work, rude ones who practically throw my change at me so it falls on the floor and then "Oh! I'm sorry!"
People entering the EXIT doors expecting me to give way to them.
AND FOR THE SAKE OF ALL THINGS GOOD PLEASE QUIET THE KID DOWN OR TAKE EM OUTSIDE MY GOD HOW HARD IS IT TO DO??????????????
If you work in a grocery store, I have the perfect revenge, just thought of it today. Bribe a buddy to get up close to the obnoxious customer, get on the store intercom, and say, clearly, "I need a price check on cocaine. Price check on cocaine, please." Then, while still on the open mic, have them lean in to the now frightened customer and ask, "Was that the Columbian or the Guatemalen you were looking for?" I know they don't do price checks anymore but it would be funny as hell to watch, anyway.