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So, my manager..


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In between making joking remarks about my preference for chubby men he told me "You'd be so proud of me because I'm taking care of my diet and health now..blah blah blah." His first step was a program called "master cleanse" I believe.

 

Shed some light on this "Master cleanse" crash diet "fast" please. It consists of lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper for 10 days and no food. This can't be good for you and I'd like to know specifically why. I was not going to get irrational and tell him that it's a dumb idea and that he's an idiot.

 

So let's discuss

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I just flip when people think crazy dieting is taking care of their health. SURE you're gonna lose weight, but at what cost?

Master cleanse = no protein or fats, acid, acid, acid...

Doesn't seem like a very good idea. I've also heard it gives you terrible diarrhea (???).

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It's not in your best interest to call your manager an idiot.. Even though it can be tempting lol!

 

The Master Cleanse is a fad diet. Fad diets aren't going to go away anytime soon. I personally wouldn't worry about it. People at my work talk about stuff like this too and I usually don't offer any input unless I'm asked.

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  • 2 weeks later...

yeah, the "Master Cleanse" is this wonderful fad detox also sometimes called "The Lemonade Diet." You do that above mentioned drink in lieu of ANY food for 2 weeks. It was developed by a doctor in the 40s, and no more modern science has altered it since it's creation. It pops up as a fad again at about once a decade, because women lose weight on it quickly (about 5-10 pounds, pretty standard considering you a) starve yourself and b) flush out your bowels) and tell ALL their friends that its a miracle cure.

 

The cayenne and lemon juice is actually a good idea for boosting your metabolism, but not eating isn't. One of my favorite things to do first thing in the morning is to take a shot (in an actual shot glass) of ACV, lemon juice, and cayenne pepper. It helps "wake up" my digestive system so I can eat breakfast without feeling nauseous, and boosts said metabolism. But then I EAT afterwards, lol.

 

They also use Grade B maple syrup, which has slightly higher amounts of trace minerals than the regular stuff, and claim you're getting all your nutrients from that....cuz sucrose totally = all nutrients. lol.

 

It's a bigger scam than the atkins diet, and just as crazy. It will never cease to amaze me how hoards of women will starve themselves for weeks, but eating healthy is "too hard" to do.

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I KNOW WTF

Anyways, all fad diets are just temporary solutions anyways. People call my diet "Stupid", or "inconvenient" but look at me! I'm fit! I look awesome! If I get hit by a bus everyone's gonna be after my superduper healthy organs.

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The master cleanse is a cleanse, not recommended for longer than 14 days. The syrup is for energy and calories, the lemon is to help get rid of mucus and so is the cayenne.

 

It is not a fad/crash diet, it is a cleanse to rid toxins..its a detox

 

He could try water fasting for 3-7 days, juice fasting or dry fasting (FOR 1 DAY ONLY)

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It is not a fad/crash diet, it is a cleanse to rid toxins..its a detox

I'm sure the human body can "cleanse" itself by using the liver.

If the people on this thing are consuming less than 2000 calories, what physical activity are they allotted? Wowza.

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That's what bugs me about all these hippies that spout off about how you "need" to "cleanse" your body.

We were equipped with organs that do that for us. Liver, kidneys, bowel etc. Now, if you're eating crap all the time, you are probably not getting enough fiber. So, you're probably full of shit. All you do is: Stop eating crap and eat more fiber. Then your body uses this awesome thing called the POOPING MECHANISM to clean you out.

Okay, actually it's called "peristalsis" but pooping mechanisms written in caps is more fun.

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That's what bugs me about all these hippies that spout off about how you "need" to "cleanse" your body.

We were equipped with organs that do that for us. Liver, kidneys, bowel etc. Now, if you're eating crap all the time, you are probably not getting enough fiber. So, you're probably full of shit. All you do is: Stop eating crap and eat more fiber. Then your body uses this awesome thing called the POOPING MECHANISM to clean you out.

Okay, actually it's called "peristalsis" but pooping mechanisms written in caps is more fun.

 

Hahaha!

 

I've been wondering why they have so many "cleanse" products at health food stores. I guess they sell well....

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My philisophy is: Don't get backed up with shit to begin with and you won't have to clean it out.

 

Buuut, for those who HAVE eaten poorly for years, changing their diet ought to be enough. I know when most people drastically change from eating a junk-filled diet to a clean whole-foods diet, they often feel weird for a few weeks and get diarrhea and stuff. There's your cleansing.

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