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my before pictures. The links work now


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I couldn't see your photos.

 

Btw, if your goal is to build muscle, you WILL gain some weight. Some of it will be fat, just to be forewarned. It's just part of the process. Building muscle requires a lot of energy that you'll need from food. If you don't eat enough, you'll end up feeling drained and your body won't be able to repair itself efficiently.. resulting in you getting sick easily and all that stuff. This is known as "overtraining".

 

I suffered from anorexia as a teenager, and I relapsed in 2008. Be careful, and know when to ask for help if you need it

Other than that, weight-training is very rewarding and you'll feel amazing!

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If you can find a Crossfit class near your home, that's a great workout. Once I incorporated that into the mix, the muscles were popping out....I do a ton of cardio and weights, too. I had to really up my intake of food in order to start to see results. I wasn't eating enough or often enough and felt so drained. When you're pushing your body, you need to also fuel the body. At first I thought I was going to gain fat, but I didn't. I did see the number on the scale increase, but my inches went down. It's all a process...but it's well worth it.

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TFraisier I live in a town of 40000 people. No crossfit anywhere to be found. My gym offers a lot of other classes. Maybe I will check the gym in the next town over where the population is closer to 100000. I read an article about crossfit in one of my magazines this month. I can't remember which one. I think it was Oxygen. Maybe I can design my own workout at my gym but I doubt that I'll be able to line up all those exercises in one portion of the gym and just rotate. Isn't that how it works? 4-6 different exercises. You do one for like a minute or so and then rotate to the next one and so on.

 

marcina You'll be happy to know that I gained 3 pounds this week. I hope it was all muscle but obviously I can't be sure and I don't know where it went because I can't see any difference. I'm willing to maybe get up to 105 at the most but even that idea is very scary to me.

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Your weight can fluctuate between 2-5 pounds just in water every day.

 

To be honest, ever since my last bout with my ED, I stopped weighing myself. I don't own a scale at all. I'm still very active, and I workout almost everyday, and I probably weigh about 120, but my legs are totally solid now. It's pretty awesome.

I worry more about being healthy than I do about being lean.

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Mizzorunner,

 

I know it is very hard to live with a constant eating disorder, but to be honest to you. You are too skinny even in the last pictures. If you wanna be ripped and muscular you need to eat small portions of food (1 palm size fatfree protein & 1 palm size complex carbo) at least six times a day! Your body need to built up again the muscle mass and therefore it needs fuel aka FOOD, its all gone. Too much cardio will make you even more skinny and not muscular (stop at 40minutes!). You should concentrate on weight lifting at least 3 times a week and EATING. Without frequently eating you won't reach that goal.

Please think about an appointment at a psychologist before starting training. I struggeled with this as a teenager as well. You need a therapist!

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Thanks everybody for the feedback.

 

I've been seeing various psychologists for years. I have been in many treatment centers. I know I am still too thin but I'm so afraid of getting bigger. I'm trying to work on it. I'm trying to work on my eating. It's just a constant struggle.

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